Real Life

Once a week I try to convince myself that it is maybe not that bad to marry for money and not for love.

OMG I'm kidding, I promise. I think.

Last time I asked on Instagram what I should write about a few people said, "Work Life", "Work From Home" and “Work Life Balance”.

To me balance means not feeling like your job is taking over your life. Now that I have started typing, I have no idea where to begin because I'm not even sure I'm doing this correctly.

The word “balance” bothers me a bit because I don’t know if it’s realistic or even constant but let’s go off the assumption that it is indeed the achievable goal.

I wake up in the morning, shower, pray and get dressed. I usually wear sweatpants and a random sweater on a good day, and those African auntie dresses on the other days. I follow this woman on TikTok who shares her cute work from home outfits and how they make her feel more confident and productive. Realistically, I don’t have the capacity, but I love that for her and everyone who does that. Adding half and half milk, vanilla syrup and a bit of cinnamon in my white mug, is the highlight of my morning. Ok this just sounds sad.

I turn on my laptop, plug in my monitor, log in to Microsoft teams and open TikTok. Yes ,TikTok is the second part of my breakfast, my second addiction. As I open Outlook, I cross my fingers hoping that one of my meetings has been moved or canceled because something about engaging in a full-blown conversation at 9am doesn’t sit right with me. I spend a few minutes rearranging the items on my desk which were purchased as a result of being TikTok influenced. I scroll through my email, hit reply and copy and paste “Hello, hope all is well....” a few times.

Three years in my job and I still can’t explain what I do. I do something though, I do it pretty good, in the exact words of my manager, I’m a “rockstar". Yes, I work in consulting. I started off working in general Strategy Consulting and recently specialized in Financial Consulting ( I don't want to bore you with the details). It's kind of weird that I still really like my job especially when you know that it has nothing to do with what I studied in undergrad. I don’t think its what most people will find “cool”, but I love it. I also highly recommend working in consulting if you’re not too sure what you want to do after college but want to start working. I was able to perfect my data analysis, critical thinking and communication skills. It gives you a little bit of everything. You'll be able to work on short term projects (so little commitment) and you get to learn skills that you will use in any job you end up in. I knew what I wanted to do after college, just not how to get there. I felt like I needed a few more useful years but without fully committing to anything that I might not want to do anymore.

Wait, am I talking about my professional life or my love life?

Working from home is really a blessing, I can’t imagine settling for anything else.

I try to do the most of my work between the hours of 9 and 5 so I don’t take work “home” (well from my desk in the living room to my bed). I can’t lie, the first year was tough, I started my first big girl job a week before the COVID shutdown, a few months after my 21st birthday. It is a funny not so funny story. I moved to a whole new city, moved into a new apartment and bought a bunch of work outfits just to be fully working from home a week later. I started on a Monday and by Thursday we had bottles of hand sanitizers on every desk speculating about this virus from China. Friday, we left work thinking we were catching a flight on Sunday to go to our firms consulting training camp somewhere near Chicago. I woke up on Monday morning working from my apartment building lounge because my furniture-less apartment didn’t even have Wi-Fi yet. I was in a city where I had no friends, far away from family struggling to order masks, hand sanitizers and gloves from Amazon. Yes, gloves someone on the news at the time said we needed them.

A few weeks turned into a few months and a few months turned into a few years.

For a moment there I wish I hadn’t graduated college early and was still at Penn State with my friends, in an environment I was familiar with. But that was just for a moment, I learned to be happy and grateful to be where I was despite the circumstances. I was taking the time to enjoy my new job, learn new skills and make new friends along the way. Quarantine gave me the time and space I needed to re-evaluate what I thought I had already established, my future career. There are so many opportunities out there we are unaware of, so it’s okay to change or “modify” your plan. I learned that and I did that. I won’t get into detail on the projects I’m working on, but my new plan is a product of my open- mindedness and experiences. It’s okay not to know what to do but I do suggest using that time usefully. Put in a few hours a week to work on a new skill, take a course or two on Coursera or just read. Read the autobiographies of people you look up to or self- development books with captivating covers. Moments of uncertainty and the lack of motivation will arise, believe me I’m going through it right now, but a support system does help. Whether it’s a group of supportive friends you can bounce ideas off of and brainstorm with or a LinkedIn networking group that shares your interest, find a niche. You can do it alone, but why would you if there are so many resources out there, they’re out there for a reason.

Back to the balance talk, make sure you add things to your routine that make you happy. At least once a week, I put time aside to be with my friends, watch my favorite shows and find an excuse to wear those high heels in my closet. Jobs are cool, they pay your bills and to some extent give you a sense of purpose and value but at the end of the day you still have a life to live. It’s easier said than done but it’s something that needs to be done. Work life balance comes with boundaries that need to be set and enforced.

But what do I know I’m just a girl sharing her manière de vivre...